HAWMC Day 20: Burnout

Today's task for WEGO Health's Health Activist Writer's Challenge for Day 20 is to talk about what is feels like to be burnt out and if you can identify any triggers.

This one took me a while to be able to answer. I had to think about it a lot. Although my cancer journey was intense it was also pretty slow. I find that most times burnout happens when things are fast paced and very time consuming. My treatment was not like that, I had no where to be but where ever they told me to be. I had lots of time even though it wasn't fun times. So even though I was so sick I never got burnt out during that time.

I do remember a time shortly after I completed my treatment. My oncologist had warned me that it would take me some time to get back to feeling normal he even quoted 6 months, which I thought was a long stretch. I finished treatment mid November and was back to work the first week in December.

I had a rough time. I got cold after cold, repeated respiratory infections, sinus infections, couldn't breath, couldn't sleep from all the coughing. I was constantly at doctors appointments and trying to find away to make me feel better. I was even seen by an allergist and pulmonologist. I was on antibiotics and various inhalers.

There was one day were I just couldn't take it any longer. I was burnt out by the whole process. I was constantly going here and there and taking meds and not getting any better. Or if I did it was short lived. I remember this day vividly I literally broke down and just cried! I was sick of being sick. I had been so sick for so long and when I finally finished my treatment everything was supposed to be fine so why was I still sick. Luckily I had my husband who did no more than just be there for me and let me cry.

So I would have to say that my way of getting through it is having a way to release. Mine in this instance happen to be crying but it isn't always that way. Sometime my minor release can be doing something for myself, going on vacation or now spending some time at the gym.

I will tell you that I successfully got through all my illnesses and as it turns out my oncologist was right it took me 6 months to really "recover" and be able to breath appropriately. Guess I should listen a little better!